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Judge Eric Profancik • Location: Cincinnati, OH
• Member since: April 2002
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Movie Review: Next
April 28th, 2007 6:16PM

Today is my first trip to the theater in 2007. I actually don't even remember the last film I saw in a theater in 2006, but I'm thinking it's been close to 9 months since I plunked down $7.25 (for a matinée!) for a movie. What finally pulled me out of my doldrum? If you didn't skip the title, then you know it's Nicolas Cage's latest entry into the action genre, Next. Of course, bibliophiles, don't confuse this with Michael Crichton's latest piece of fiction. Then again, I doubt bibliophiles read such banal fare.

So, what do we have here? We have exactly what the trailer shows us. Nic plays Cris something-or-other, a man with a bad haircut who can see two minutes into his future. Julianne Moore plays some overacting, tough-as-nails FBI agent who has figured out what Nic can do. She decides she must recruit him in the hunt for a nuclear device that has been smuggled into the country by some odd cabal of Russians, French, and other assorted Euro-trash.

The only reason I decided to see this film is because I was in an action rut. I don't know the last mindless action flick I've seen, so that's what prompted me to see Nic do his future thing. Supposedly based on yet another Philip K. Dick story, "The Goldman Man," Next is, sadly, generic action fare. In actuality, it's barely action fare in my book, with just a few chases and the climax. I came looking for action and left wanting more.

Next is trite and light. Nothing much impressed me, leaving this one to be completely disposable and forgettable. Was it worth going to the theater? Nope. You're much better off waiting for a cheaper rental at home, for the acting is iffy, the action is lacking, much of the CGI is horribly obvious, and the ending is a bit cheap.

At least we have Jessica Biel in some nice panties, but even her hotness - which prompts Nic's character to unexplained weirdness, which too is never resolved - doesn't make it any better.

I guess I should say something slightly more positive. Well, I liked when we got to the point where Cris walked around with no cares, with full impunity. That cockiness was fun to watch. And when Cris did his future thing, more often then not, it brought forth a little chuckle (from pretty much the entire audience) seeing him manipulate events to his betterment.

Tonight, I've rented Deja Vu and I hope that'll give me all the mindless temporal action I'm wanting. Definitely a rental.

Grade: C+

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