...is really skanky. Seriously. The woman looks horrible. Like somebody stuck two water balloons on an erector set. Is there anyone who finds this creature even remotely attractive? Because I gotta tell you, she tests my gag reflex every time I see her.

Granted, she's not as skanky as Paris Hilton -- Paris Hilton is the apex of skanky, the top, the very embodiment of skanky trashy slutbag. And Britney Spears is still pretty young, so she has yet to reach her true skank potential. But Jessica Simpson... yeesh.

I seem to remember that it was in vogue to not look skanky. Back in the days of Norma Shearer and Barbara Stanwyck, or even in the days of Raquel Welch and Erin Gray (who is still a smokin' hot babe), it seemed to me that the idea was to not look like a skank. Movie stars like those had stuff Paris and Jessica could never dream of having, like hips. And personality. Back in those days, people who looked like Jessica Simpson were relegated to the run-down backwoods trailer parks that were their natural habitats.

Enough with Jessica Simpson. Enough Paris, enough Britney. Seriously.