Case Number 13644: Small Claims Court

BLIND EYE

MTI // 2006 // 80 Minutes // Rated R
Reviewed by Judge David Johnson // May 16th, 2008

The Charge

Betrayal was their first mistake.

The Case

Let me get this out of the way right now: this sumbitch moves slower than a drugged brontosaurus.

Nick (Levi Oliver) is a former cop, disgraced and fired, and stewing in his own malaise until his estranged wide Katherine returns to his life, desperate after their daughter has vanished. No one has seen the kid for days, so Nick comes home and launches his own investigation on the side. This doesn't sit well with the local authorities, but that doesn't matter because they're all scumbags on the take.

At the center of the corruption is a menacing figure from Nick's past (Roddy Piper, They Live), who's been pulling the strings and attacking Nick's family. Add to that all of Nick's slacker high school friends have ended up pursuing a life of crime. Whatever. That's cool. It just gives Nick more opportunities to punch dudes in the face.

Not that you'll likely be awake by the time he gets to face-punching. Like I said, Blind Eye moves slow. So sloooowwwwwwww. And there's nothing of interest going on to justify the lethargic pace. Well, technically, that's not true. There are moving images on the screen and sound is coming out of the speakers, but the entertainment value is nil. Plus it doesn't help that Blind Eye sports some of the most stultifying acting I've seen in some time.

Basically, until about the 60-minute mark all that happens is endless chattering, which I'm pretty sure is designed to build the characters and establish the relationships that will become so fractured at the very end (the "betrayal" part) but all it really did was...well, none of that. Nick bounces from friend to friend and they chat then he goes and chats with his wife, all the while with his daughter missing and frankly there doesn't seem to be a whole lot of urgency in his step. Maybe it's Oliver's acting style, but if my only child was kidnapped, I think I'd at least power-walk from place to place.

So then we have the whole conspiracy thing, which fails to satisfy. Apparently Roddy Piper's character is a douchebag and controls some kind of criminal empire out of his rinky-dink office space. His loyal goon army is equally unimpressive. There's a dumb-ass yokel who gets his ass exploded on a snowmobile and a couple of fat guys and, predictably, they're as effective as they sound. How this crew of underachievers was able to build a murderous crime syndicate and terrorize the local population for years is beyond me.

The game pieces are set: the bad guys have killed people that our hero likes, our hero is ready to use his super cop power to visit upon them violent justice and...how does the endgame play? Not well. The much-anticipated distribution of vengeance is a yawn-fest, essentially Nick pointing his gun at people, who promptly disarm him because he lets them get way too close, then they punch each other. The highlight of the action is the aforementioned snowmobile explosion, but for all the wrong reasons -- after taping the bad guy to the sled, Nick fires it up then shoots him with the shotgun and the snowmobile explodes like it was laced with C4. Fantastic!

Not much happening on this disc. Video is an adequate 1.85:1 anamorphic widescreen, audio is 2.0 stereo and that's it.

Review content copyright © 2008 David Johnson; Site layout and review format copyright © 1998 - 2014 HipClick Designs LLC

Scales of Justice
Judgment: 50

Perp Profile
Studio: MTI
Video Formats:
* 1.85:1 Anamorphic

Audio Formats:
* Dolby Digital 2.0 Stereo (English)

Subtitles:
* Spanish

Running Time: 80 Minutes
Release Year: 2006
MPAA Rating: Rated R

Distinguishing Marks
* None

Accomplices
* IMDb
http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0496247/combined