Case Number 24052: Small Claims Court


A&E // 2012 // 765 Minutes // Not Rated
Reviewed by Judge David Johnson // June 29th, 2012

The Charge

Good God, those uniforms.

The Case

The Astros are a laughingstock these days, and while they never made it to the promised land at any point in their fifty year history, there were apparently still enough moments to fill an hour and fifteen minute retrospective. "Astros Memories" documents Houston's transformation from the Colt .45s (only the greatest baseball team name ever conceived) to their new space-themed name, before ultimately moving into their crazy-ass Minute Maid Park where they would endure a series of heartbreaks, culminating in the team's current iteration; a pale imitation of major league baseball franchise.

This slick documentary details the ups, the downs ,and the big-name players who donned the creamsicle rainbow jersey: Jimmy Wynn, Cesar Cedeno, Jose Kruz, Craig Biggio, Jeff Bagwell, Randy Johnson, Roger (uh...hmm) Clemens, and of course the legendary Nolan Ryan.

For some reason, Ryan has always been one of my favorite players. I suspect that's because his baseball card was the most valuable in my feeble collection, clocking in at a solid $12. Of all the players spotlighted in the documentary, Ryan gets the most burn (his contemporary self also sits in the interview), which isn't surprising considering how much history he made -- and how much chin music he dished out -- while in an Astros uniform.

Joining the retrospective is a set of four complete "Greatest Games" broadcast gems: Astros vs. Dodgers, 9/26/1981 (Nolan Ryan's fifth no-hitter); Astros vs. Giants, 9/25/1986 (Mike Scott's division-clinching no-hitter); Astros vs. Braves, 10/9/2005 (NLDS clincher); Astros vs. Rockies, 6/28/2007 (Craig Biggio's 3,000th hit).

Houston Astros: 50th Anniversary Collection brings a standard definition 1.78:1 anamorphic widescreen image, Dolby 2.0 Stereo mix, and a selection of bonus segments:

* Astros No-Hitters Under The Dome
* Dierker's Diary "What Might Have Been"
* Bob Aspromonte's Home Run Story
* Craig Biggio's Biggest Night
* Bob Watson Speech
* Dierker's Diary All-Time Astros Team
* Houston Midsummer Classics
* Nolan Ryan In The Gym

The Verdict

Pity them now, but Astros fans had some good times. Not Guilty.

Review content copyright © 2012 David Johnson; Site layout and review format copyright © 1998 - 2016 HipClick Designs LLC

Scales of Justice
Judgment: 90

Perp Profile
Studio: A&E
Video Formats:
* 1.78:1 Anamorphic

Audio Formats:
* Dolby Digital 2.0 Stereo (English)

* None

Running Time: 765 Minutes
Release Year: 2012
MPAA Rating: Not Rated

Distinguishing Marks
* Bonus Segments

* Houston Astros