Well Go USA // 2011 // 114 Minutes // Not Rated
Reviewed by Judge David Johnson // September 24th, 2012
Part motorcycle. Part karate expert. All robot.
From Sushi Typhoon, a studio that has mastered the fine art of importing all manner of cinematic Japanese weirdness, comes quite possibly the weirdest of them all!
The evil Cyborg Organization Sigma is on a mission to create a super-cyborg that would enable them to take over the world. To complete this evil creation, they need to steal the DNA of high-ranking government officials; the missing ingredient for synthetic cyborg internal organs.
Standing in their way: Secret Police supercop Daimon and his karate robot Zaborgar, who can transform into a motorcycle and deploy radio-controlled toys from the top of his head. But there's more to Zaborgar than just his crime-fighting; he contains the DNA from Daimon's deceased twin brother, who passed away from man-breast-milk-poisoning.
All of the above actually happens in this movie, so I should just stop writing now. If bearing witness to this type of lunacy strikes you as a good way to spend two hours, by all means BUY this movie. Then pass it down to your children, and your children's children.
Believe me, what I'm sharing with you is only a taste of the crazy that awaits. I didn't even get into the three bikini-clad football girl warriors with dragons that come out of their breasts and butts. Or the literal tentacle sex that Daimon and his cyborg lover engage in. Or the fantastic title cards that divide the movie, my favorite being "Chapter 2: Hang in there Daimon, Adrift on the Sea of Life." What you're looking at here is a wealth of bizarre cinema; stuff so out-there it makes Executive Koala look like an episode of NCIS.
Karate-Robo Zaborgar is a comedy and a funny one at that! Despite the scantily clad women and boob-centric weaponry, it's all fairly tame. The bloodspray is CGI and there is no nudity. I'd almost say it was suitable for viewing with the kids, but I'd fear the odd doodles that may begin to surface in your child's school notebook. No, on second thought, go find yourself a group of like-minded idiots, order yourself the most trans-fat-saturated calzone you can find, and settle in for an evening of righteous tomfoolery from the Land of the Rising Sun.
I'll stop there. You're either going to be all over Karate-Robo Zaborgar or you're not. If you are, accept this iron-clad guarantee from a guy who shares your sensibilities: You will not be disappointed.
An excellent Blu-ray release from Well Go USA. The film looks slick in its 1.78:1/1080p high def presentation. Thankfully the visual effects aren't terrible, so the boosted resolution actually helps. The DTS-HD 5.1 Master Audio mix (Japanese with English subtitles) is suitably noisy for the multitude of sequences pitting a motorcycle robot against dragon-breasted bikini ladies. A pair of Zaborgar short films is your bonus content.
Welcome to the living room display rack Karate-Robo Zaborgar. You've earned it.
Not Guilty. Zaborgar 4 life!
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Scales of Justice
Studio: Well Go USA
* 1.78:1 Non-Anamorphic (1080p)
* DTS HD 5.1 Master Audio (Japanese)
Running Time: 114 Minutes
Release Year: 2011
MPAA Rating: Not Rated
* Short Films