Cinema Epoch // 2010 // 90 Minutes // Not Rated
Reviewed by Judge David Johnson // October 22nd, 2010
Underwater Terror! (That's the tagline on the disc case; just so you know, there is no terror, underwater or otherwise.)
What is Psycho Shark? That's a difficult question to answer. I can tell you what it isn't. It's not killer shark movie, despite its title and the disc case picture of the girl on the floatie raft about to be devoured by a Great White.
The best plot description I can conjure is this: two Japanese girls with breasts the size of small moons squeeze into bikinis and play in the water. One girl meets a mysterious guy and falls for him. The other girl thinks there's something off. It turns out he's sort of nuts. And then a gigantic CGI shark shows up in the last 30 seconds. And that's your movie, all 65 minutes of it.
Much of the film is told through the hand-held-camera POV, almost in a Blair Witch approach. Except instead of a scary witch terrorizing a group of terrified victims, there's a girl talking about her feelings. And after a while, the three principal characters end up on a dock. When we finally get that shark (which is the size of a 747 for some reason), it leaps out of the water and eats someone. Whether it in fact has a mental illness, I can't judge from that brief screen time.
Apparently the original title of this steamy deuce was "Jaws in Japan," which, if not for the obvious copyright infringement, would have at least given the film an absurd hook to it and perhaps fools some potential viewers into giving it a spin.
GULLIBLE MORON 1: Hey, look! A movie called Jaws in Japan! A giant shark eating Japanese people! That might be cool!
GULLIBLE MORON 2: Sounds great! I like Jaws and I have to confess, I'm curious about what an ambitious filmmakers from overseas would do with the formula. Let's get it!
(one hour later)
GULLIBLE MORON 1: My life is a shambles.
By then, the damage was done and Cinema Epoch slyly collected some more data supporting their push to harness the next incoherent import for stateside release.
The DVD: a dodgy 1.78:1 anamorphic widescreen is joined by a 2.0 stereo track (Japanese), a behind-the-scenes of featurette, and a trailer gallery.
There's a psycho. And there's a shark. And that's about it. Guilty.
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Scales of Justice
Studio: Cinema Epoch
* 1.78:1 Anamorphic
* Dolby Digital 2.0 Stereo (Japanese)
Running Time: 90 Minutes
Release Year: 2010
MPAA Rating: Not Rated
* Image Gallery