All Rise...

Judge David Johnson has 18 lice and counting.

The Charge

Holy Crap.

The Case

The Duggar family has a larger population than most Midwestern zip codes. Led by dad Joe Bob and mom Michelle, the Duggar family and all 18 of their kids, travel to a bunch of destinations on embark on some fairly boring adventures and it all gets filmed for 18 Kids and Counting: Season 3.

This season has the Duggars sojourning on such exciting escapades as:

Bowling!

Grandkid!

Visiting their congressman!

Going to a hockey game!

Hitting makeshift piñatas!

Eating pizza!

Taking a helicopter ride!

Touring a farm!

And much, much more!

Fine, the use of the exclamation points was entirely sarcastic and slightly dickish. But there's no way around it, 18 Kids and Counting is saccharine fluff. Episodes aren't very interesting and the personalities of the family members are lukewarm. And while that may make for a solid, cohesive family unit, must-see TV it is not.

Still, the show is popular and a family with 18 kids is a wild dose of reality. That they happen to be mundane (read: not sleazy and awful) would keep the Duggars off of MTV, but isn't there a place for that? Yes, and TLC has framed their exploits as family-friendly fare. And it is. Park you and your kids in front of the set if you want to watch a healthy, happy, modest family that happens to consist of the numbers of a small Middle Eastern province and prepare for an inoffensive look into the logistics of hauling around a 20-person cavalcade of cheerful, well-adjusted, religiously-oriented Arkansans.

It may not make it on my DVR, but I am glad the Duggars' life can be chronicled. At the very least I appreciate their stability. And audiences sick of the usual tabloid dysfunction and debauchery in their reality offerings will find an oasis of syrupy values awaiting them.

The three-DVD set is pedestrian: 1.78:1 anamorphic widescreen, 5.1 surround, no extras.

The Verdict

Not Guilty. Hey, guys…watch some TV for a change.

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