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Case Number 15039

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BachelorMan

Magnolia Pictures // 2003 // 91 Minutes // Rated R
Reviewed by Judge David Johnson // November 19th, 2008

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All Rise...

Judge David Johnson ceased being a bachelor when he got married. There it is, cat's out of the bag.

The Charge

Love needs a hero.

Opening Statement

Feel like spending 90 minutes watching a jackass who has casual, inconsequential sex fall in love?

Facts of the Case

Ted Davis (David Deluise) is said jackass, a network executive who can't get enough of the ladies. In fact he's perfected the art of sleeping around as a science, forging slam-dunk pick-up lines and list of bachelor rules that, if followed, will almost certainly lead to shattered self-esteem and exotic venereal diseases.

His swinging lifestyle changes—surprise!—when a beautiful woman (Missi Pyle) moves next door and she promptly steals his virus-addled heart. It's decision time for Ted—does he say goodbye to the anonymous fornication in exchange for a potentially meaningful relationship?

The Evidence

Sometimes different people think different things are funny. No getting around that. This sounds like the lead-up to a cop-out, and, well, it probably is, but that's the only way I can think of how to frame this review. I have no doubt some people will find BachelorMan charming and hilarious and smart. And there's nothing wrong with that. And I can see how they would think it.

But, I have to say, I found the film to be oppressively corny. Ted, his goofy friends, his goofy friends' shenanigans (Ha! Look at them, they can't pick up that girl!), his daydreams, those animated shorts starring "BachelorMan"—none of it worked for me. As in "I was cringing throughout."

David Deluise seems to be having a good time and he definitely gives this thing his all, but, again, just not feeling his character. His Ted Davis is a pompous a-hole who I wish the opposite of good tidings for—can you really sleep with a ton of women with little to no bad side effects? I mean, even a hurt feeling or something? His bachelor rules are cheesy and contrived and his little, cute asides, where he envisions goofy scenarios, are tremendously lame. Missi Pyle benefits a bit more, mainly because her character is more palatable. But I never fully bought into their relationship and, frankly, didn't care whether they ended up together or not (hint: they do).

The whole thing is formulaic, too. Male bimbo sleeps around, meets a woman who strikes him as more interesting than the onslaught of partners he's had in the past, resists the urge of his friends to settle down, starts up a relationship with the girl, screws it up, tries to revert back to his DNA-carpet-bombing ways, somehow—because the script called for it, I'm guessing—loses his mojo, and the two may or may not find their way back to each other and may or may not reconcile and may or may not SPOILER WARNING! get married.

Yeah, this review is sounding pretty negative, and it's true I found BachelorMan irritating and overwrought instead of witty and subversive, but again, there's a possibility that this might be the comedy for you. Do you think an animated superhero named BachelorMan flying around a breast-shaped building is funny? Then maybe you'll get a kick out of this.

A solid 1.78:1 anamorphic widescreen is joined by a 5.1 surround mix, totaling a passable technical presentation. Extras a plentiful: a robust behind-the-scenes feature looking at elements of production, casting and pre-production, deleted scenes, outtakes, some fake promos from the fictional TV network in the film and trailers.

Closing Statement

The DVD is loaded, but the movie simply bugged me.

The Verdict

Guilty. You might want to have that rash checked out.

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Scales of Justice

Video: 85
Audio: 85
Extras: 85
Acting: 70
Story: 60
Judgment: 66

Perp Profile

Studio: Magnolia Pictures
Video Formats:
• 1.78:1 Anamorphic
Audio Formats:
• Dolby Digital 5.1 Surround (English)
• Dolby Digital 2.0 Stereo (English)
Subtitles:
• Spanish
Running Time: 91 Minutes
Release Year: 2003
MPAA Rating: Rated R
Genre:
• Comedy

Distinguishing Marks

• Featurettes
• Deleted Scenes
• Outtakes
• Fake Promos

Accomplices

• IMDb








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