Judge P.S. Colbert is confused: Is a slap-and-tickle different than a bubble-and-squeak?
"A double dose of hilarity."
Wot's for tea, Mum?
We've got Heinz Baked Beans, Cucumber sandwiches and assorted Toffees. 'Ere, it's Friday, innit?
Right. Wot's on Telly, then?
Well, Auntie Prunella's brought 'round a disc with two of them "Carry On" films, now didn't she?
Eh? Who are they when they're at home?
Don't be daft, son! You remember all those Rank Film Studios comedies? Cor, there must've been hundreds of 'em! This one's got two from the '60s:
Follow That Camel (Carry on in the Legion) and Don't Lose Your Head (Carry on Pimpernel). Ooh-wee; they've both got that lovely Jim Dale (Pete's Dragon) in 'em, as well!
'Ere, he's that bloke what got an Oscar nomination for writing' that Georgy Girl song, isn't he? Goes down quite a storm on Broadway these days, I'm told.
Yes. Anyways, in Follow That Camel he plays this twitty bloke named Bertrand Oliphant West,—whom everybody calls 'Bo'—and right at the beginning, he's accused of tripping his mate during a big match and winds up getting kicked out of this tosh Cricket club., He's also banned from seeing Lady Jane Ponsonby, (Angela Douglas) who's the club owner's daughter. All this drives poor Bo so barmy that he runs off to Algeria to join the foreign legion with Simpson, his butler (Peter Butterworth).
Peter Butterworth? D'ya means to tell me that the "Meddling Monk" from Doctor Who is in it as well? Cor blimey!
Oh, I dare say, they've got him and a right lot of the regular "Carry On" players. Kenneth Williams plays the Commandant Maxmilian Burger; he's a fair shade of Nazi, even tho it's only supposed to be 1906! There's that Bernard Bresslaw (Krull) falling about as some mad Sheik named Abdul Abulbul—he's busy collecting wives and calling for some jihad against the soldiers, and Phil Silvers --
Wot? Phil Silvers? Ain't he that American bloke always playing Sgt. Bilko in black and white reruns? It can't be him, can it?
Same one, but the picture's in color, and he's STILL playing old Bilko, tho he's called Sgt. Nocker now. He's still got that 'orrible accent, and the bad jokes about how he's God's gift to all the saucy, buxom wenches parading about in veil dances and all. Him always wearing them spectacles what got no glass in them. I heard he really was blind as a bat and wore contacts, which kept falling out onto the set, and he constantly had poor, dear Jim Dale crawlin' about looking for 'em in the sand --
So, he's playing an American soldier in Algeria, then?
I don't think they ever say where he's from, but what else can the man do but flounce around like some Bronx fop?
Oh no, wait! The fops come into the second picture, Don't Lose Your Head, which is set in France during the revolution. Now, Phil Silvers ain't in this one, but Jim Dale plays this fop by name of Lord Darcy, who's assisting his friend Sir Rodney Ffing—that's with two Fs, mind-also known as "the Black fingernail," and he's played by Sid James, who was really king of the "Carry On-ers," you know. These two have cooked up some fun between them trying to rescue French royals from the blade, much to the dismay of leading citizens Robespierre (Peter Gilmore) and Camembert (Kenneth Williams) of the new French secret police, who calls himself "the big cheese," of course!
Right, got it --
Do stop interrupting me, boy! There's your meddlin' Mole whatisname Butterworth again, this time playin' some poor sod called Citizen Bidet, get it? Oh, and let's don't forget Joan Sims, she plays this top-heavy Frenchie what Sid James calls "a picture, if a trifle overexposed," because you know she had the bosoms, and all the English royalty are played with lisps and other speech impediments --
Sounds frightfully, wickedly HIL-arious!
Oh, you cheeky git! Your age wouldn't know about sophisticated humour, now would ya? All you lot know nowadays are four letter words and leaving all the clothes in the corner for your movies! These films was done when we had a bit more imagination and guile --
Ahem, yes. So, what do they look like, I mean, quality-wise?
Well, they look fine for films of their advancing years, don't they? A bit of speck here and there, maybe, perhaps the color's a tick faded, but them low budget things they shot at Pinewood Studios, London, weren't the best to begin with, you know. The first picture is presented 1.78:1 letterboxed, and the second is 1.78:1 anamorphic. The audio for both of 'em is a fair 2.0 mono, with each offering an "Enhanced Sound" option, though I really couldn't tell much difference with it on or off. You can hear things pretty well, but if you're having trouble, they got subtitles in English, as well. Oh, and there's a nice little photo gallery in the Extras section, also. So, what say we give these a gander, eh? They're cracking good old fashioned fun!
Erm, well, thanks mum, but I'm off to join the lads down the road for some pint, bitters and Snookeroo. Ta!
Oh, sod off, then! That boy never half knew a good time when it bit him, anyways!
A bit bawdy, perhaps, but not in the least bit guilty!
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Scales of Justice, Don't Lose Your Head
Perp Profile, Don't Lose Your Head
Studio: VCI Home Video
Distinguishing Marks, Don't Lose Your Head
• Photo Gallery
Scales of Justice, Follow That Camel
Perp Profile, Follow That Camel
Studio: VCI Home Video
Distinguishing Marks, Follow That Camel
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