The Case
(15 minutes earlier)
Okey-dokey, another four adventures of Nick Jr's
go-to conquistadoress, Dora the Explorer. For those not in on the lowdown,
here's how it shakes out: Dora is this ultra-annoying little girl who doesn't
talk so much as shriek her words at you. Each episode chronicles a mindless
adventure that she embarks on, aided by her trusty monkey friend Boots and her
brother Diego. To help them on their quest, they consult Map, a talking map with
a voice almost as grating as Dora's. Along the way they are confronted by some
truly mind-boggling puzzles, like choosing the path with the frog on it, and
look to you (the viewer) to help them through the obstacles. The whole thing
encourages interaction from your preschooler as he or she attempts to match
decibels with Dora, shouting the answers back at her, until, with child and
cartoon character screaming at the top of their voices, your house resembles one
of those 19th century British insane asylums.
• "Save Diego"
Diego finds himself in danger and
dangling from a rope when he goes mountain climbing to rescue an animal. It
falls to Dora and the gang to spring him from his plight. But before they can
haul his broke ass home they have to negotiate the dangers of the rainforest.
Can you help them?
• "Baby Jaguar's Roar"
Baby Bear is stuck on the
top of Big Mountain and the little bastard has no way to get down. It's time
again for Dora's crew to leap into action, as she, Boots, Diego and Baby Jaguar
"jump, swim and climb like jaguars" to Big Mountain. Can you jump like
a jaguar?
• "Click!"
No, sadly, it's not the sound of the
DVD player powering down before this episode ends, but rather the snap of Dora's
camera. She's off to nab pictures of animals in their environment and wants you
to identify creatures hiding out in the forest. Can you strike a pose?
• "Hic-Boom-Ohh"
Is that what was cried out the
moment Dora was conceived? Of course not, and that's disgusting thank you very
much. We actually don't what that sound is, but luckily the intrepid Dora and
the intrepid you are on hand to maneuver through the woods and find out what
animal is making such a weird sound! Can you figure it out?
And we're done. Four more mind-numbing proto-interactive animated adventures
in the can. Will the tots like it? Judging by the show's popularity and how it
elicits reactions from the viewers, you bet they will. So, Dora fans,
rejoice—yet another DVD to add to the collection. As for me,
I…er…what is that in my head?
No.
No!
It can't
be.
That voice…that voice just continues to torment me.
"Ola!"
"Can you help me figure out what path to
take?!?"
"I'm Dora! I will eat your soul!!!"
Shut Up!!! SHUT UP!!! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SHUT UP!!!!
Give us your feedback!
Did we give Dora The Explorer: Animal Adventures a fair trial? yes / no
What's "fair"? Whether positive or negative, our reviews should be unbiased, informative, and critique the material on its own merits.
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