Judge David Johnson can't stop having nightmares.
When there is no room in Hell, the Doodlebops will walk the earth.
The Old Ones talk of a time before time, an era marked by Hellish nightmares spawned fro the abyss that would lay waste to each other on the physical plane and torment the souls of the Damned in the spiritual nether-regions of darkness and acid drizzle. Many diabolical creatures existed then, and some have managed to survive throughout the ages of mankind to spread their pestilence and death to the world. Of all of them, the most powerful were the Doodlebops.
There are three Doodlebops: Rooney, Deedee and Moe. They are of an unknown species, though they speak fluent English, are bipedal, appear to be vertebrates and are most certainly warm-blooded. These Doodlebops can be easily noticed because of their clothing and skin pigmentation, a flamboyant pastel mix of blues, purples and oranges, as well as their wild unkempt hair and tendency to randomly break out into song and dance routines.
It has widely been reported that they live in a one-room lair, populated by a talking moose head and a dog that plays music. Occasionally, a plump, good-natured African-American woman will wander in and espouse some valuable life lessons. Following some more singing and dancing, the Doodlebops jump into their conveyance, a custom bus driven by an odd, lonely man with. The bus will drive them to a venue where these bizarre creatures will perform excruciating music in front of helpless children. And, what can only be explained via Stockholm syndrome, the children seem to appreciate it.
Lately, the Doodlebops have augmented their insidious incursion into the North American popular culture through technology. The latest example of this is the newly released Happy Doodle Holidays DVD, which includes four episodes of their television show. Here is what you can expect if you decide to obtain the disc—God help you:
"The Doodlebops Holiday Show"
"Don't Use It, Don't Need It"
"Deedee's Big Break"
Disturbing, colorful, repetitive—about par for the course for children's entertainment these days. The kids will surely devour it, but you might want to have some vodka and Prozac on emergency standby.
Full frame, 2.0 stereo and four sing-alongs, two dance-alongs and some Godforsaken knock-knock jokes.
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