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Case Number 17732: Small Claims Court

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WWE: Hell in a Cell 2009

WWE // 2009 // 180 Minutes // Not Rated
Reviewed by Judge Franck Tabouring (Retired) // November 18th, 2009

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All Rise...

Judge Franck Tabouring usually stays away from steel cages. He prefers plastic boxes instead.

Editor's Note

Our reviews of WWE: Hell in a Cell 2008 (published October 20th, 2008), WWE: Hell in a Cell 2010 (published December 18th, 2010), and WWE: Hell in a Cell 2011 (published December 10th, 2011) are also available.

The Charge

It's time to step through the gates of hell.

The Case

WWE's biggest stars enter the devil's playground in WWE: Hell in a Cell 2009, a pay-per-view during which every main match takes place inside the threatening steel cell. Of course, several championships are on the line as well, and here is what the show has to offer this year:

• CM Punk vs. Undertaker in a Hell in a Cell Match for the World Heavyweight Championship
WWE steps things up a bit by starting this PPV with a main event. I'm all for it. So is the audience in attendance, as Undertaker and Punk deliver an overall clean, decent match. Clocking in at 10 minutes, this title match ends up being a well-coordinated battle between the two athletes, who deliver a series of solid moves and plenty of counter actions. I wouldn't go as far and call this one truly memorable, but as an opener inside the big cell, it works well.

• John Morrison vs. Dolph Ziggler in an Intercontinental Championship Match
John Morrison goes head-to-head with Dolph Ziggler, and the two wrestlers put on a surprisingly decent show. At 15 minutes, this fight is fast-paced, entertaining, and filled with powerful moves, pins, and counter maneuvers. Good matchup!

• Mickie James vs. Alicia Fox in a Divas Championship Match
Even though this title matchup between the two divas is by no means boring, it's not particularly intriguing either. At 5 minutes, it's a short battle boasting a handful of decent high-risk moves, and that certainly works for me. Not bad, ladies!

• Big Show & Chris Jericho vs. Batista & Rey Mysterio in a Unified Tag Team Championship Match
Even though this one doesn't take place inside the cell, the four athletes still manage to deliver some high-risk wrestling action. Batista and Rey Mysterio are especially amusing to observe, but even Big Show and Jericho work together pretty well in this 13-minute tag team battle. Lots of clean, powerful moves and solid teamwork turns this one into yet another entertaining matchup. Things are looking pretty good for this PPV right now, so let's hope it will last.

• John Cena vs. Randy Orton in a Hell in a Cell Match for the WWE Championship
The second main event features Orton and Cena (yet again). While they both deliver a series of impressive moves, they also spend too much time playing around with submission maneuvers. Sadly enough, they also don't make much use of the cell. The ending of this 21-minute matchup sucks big time, but at least it doesn't ruin the entire battle.

• R-Truth vs. Drew McIntyre
For some reason, WWE writers figured it would be a good idea to give Drew McIntyre his PPV debut. As far as I'm concerned, that was a big mistake. McIntyre's 4-minute match against R-Truth lacks energy and entertainment, and even the crowd realizes that pretty quickly. We do get to see a couple of okay moves, but this short fight is boring nonetheless.

• Kofi Kingston vs. The Miz vs. Jack Swagger in a Triple Threat Match for the U.S. Championship
This is an excellent match. Clocking in at 8 minutes, this title matchup really delivers the goods, as all three wrestlers show off their incredible flexibility via a series of crazy moves and big dives. Kofi Kingston especially knows exactly how to amuse his fans, but even Miz and Swagger deliver solid enough performances. Needless to say, this Triple Threat battle counts among the best matches of this PPV so far. Let's check in with the final main event.

• D-Generation X vs. Legacy in a Hell in a Cell Match
I'm not quite sure why the WWE decided to have this match go last, but whatever. This tag team battle runs for 25 minutes, and while the first part is certainly disappointing, things start to get a tad better during the second half. Don't expect to see tons of team action though, because for most of the time, this one feels more like a handicap match. Luckily, things speed up toward the end, giving this match a much-needed boost to wrap up this overall satisfying event.

As usual, I have no complaints when it comes to discussing the technical aspects of his DVD. This is a wrestling show, and the picture quality and sound transfer accomplish what they're supposed to accomplish. As far as the bonus material is concerned, it fails miserably. All we get to see is a short post-match clip folks didn't get to see on TV.

WWE: Hell in a Cell 2009 is a way better pay-per-view than its predecessor WWE: Breaking Point. None of these matches are spectacular, but most are more entertaining than you'd expect.

The Verdict

Not guilty.

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Scales of Justice

Judgment: 82

Perp Profile

Studio: WWE
Video Formats:
• Full Frame
Audio Formats:
• Dolby Digital 5.1 Surround (English)
• Dolby Digital 2.0 Stereo (Spanish)
Subtitles:
• None
Running Time: 180 Minutes
Release Year: 2009
MPAA Rating: Not Rated
Genres:
• Sports
• Television

Distinguishing Marks

• Bonus Clip

Accomplices

• Official Site








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