Editor's Note

Our reviews of He-Man And The Masters Of The Universe: Season One, Volume One (published November 2nd, 2005), He-Man And The Masters Of The Universe: Season One, Volume Two (published February 13th, 2006), He-Man And The Masters Of The Universe: Season Two, Volume Two (published November 22nd, 2006), He-Man And The Masters Of The Universe (2002): The Complete Series (published October 26th, 2009), He-Man And The Masters Of The Universe (2002): Volume One (published February 27th, 2008), He-Man And The Masters Of The Universe (2002): Volume Three (published August 20th, 2008), and He-Man And The Masters Of The Universe (2002): Volume Two (published June 11th, 2008) are also available.

The Charge

The following transcript is from the FireMoon Dragon Hammer Evening 32 broadcast of All Night Long with Ram-Man.

Opening Statement

Ram-Man: Hello everyone and welcome to tonight's show, an event I know many of you have been waiting for. Yes, to celebrate the recent release of He-Man Season 2, Volume 1, we've decided to dedicate the entire show to a panel retrospect on our Eternian memories. So we invite you to take a spin back to Grayskull as we present "The Very Special Masters of the Universe Reunion."

Facts of the Case

Ram-Man: It's an exciting night tonight. Before I bring out my first guests, I thought I'd mention a bit about the impetus behind this special. BCI Eclipse has released its third installment in the He-Man and the Masters of the Universe animated series, a show which chronicled the adventures of the people you're about to meet. As usual, the set is top-notch. The first 33 episodes of the massive 65-episode second season are spread over five discs in well-rendered full frame transfers. Three commentary tracks can be found on "The Cat and the Spider," "Trouble in Trolla" and "The Rainbow Warrior," featuring special features producer Andy Mangels, Lou and Erika Scheimer, Larry DiTillio, Tom Sito, Tom Tataranowicz and Dave Teague. Disc Six is devoted entirely to the extra features, including two great half-hour documentaries, "The Stories of He-Man and the Masters of the Universe Season 2, Volume 1" and "The Magic of Filmation," which bring back the writers and artists and creators of the show discuss the behind-the-scenes conceptualizing and execution. Additionally, you get two collectible art cards, a storyboard comparison feature, 50 profiles of characters and artifacts, trivia facts for every episode and five DVD-ROM accessible scripts. A staggering package.

And here are the episodes:

Disc One
• "The Cat and the Spider"
• "The Energy Beast"
• "Day of the Machines"
• "The Gamesman"
• "Fisto's Forest"
• "The Rarest Gift of All"
• "The Great Books Mystery"

Disc Two
• "Origin of the Sorceress:
• "Island of Fear"
• "To Save Skeletor"
• "The Ice Age Cometh"
• "Trouble in Trolla"
• "Betrayal of Stratos"
• "Disappearing Dragons"

Disc Three
• "The Shadow of Skeletor"
• "The Arena"
• "Attack From Below"
• "Into the Abyss"
• "Fraidy Cat"
• "The Rainbow Warrior"
• "A Trip to Morainia"

Disc Four
• "Things That Go Bump in the Night"
• "Three on a Dare"
• "Just a Little Lie"
• "One for All"
• "Jacob and the Widgets"
• "The Littlest Giant"

Disc Five
• "Trouble's Middle Name"
• "Journey to Stone City"
• "A Bird in the Hand"
• "Battlecat"
• "The Time Wheel"
• "Search for the Past"

(audience applauds)

Ram-Man: Pretty impressive, huh folks? How about a hand for BCI Eclipse for putting out another fantastic release? (audience applauds) When we come back, we're going to talk to some of the folks who were actually there during these adventures. Stay tuned!

The Evidence

Ram-Man: We're back. Thanks for joining us. Let's not waste any time and get to our first guests. You know them as Eternia's legendary fighters for good and peace, ladies and gentlemen, put your hands/claws/mechanical appendages together for Prince Adam, Orko, Man-at-Arms, Teela, and Cringer!

(audience applauds wildly)

Ram-Man: Hey everyone, great to have you here.

Adam: Thanks Ram-Man, great to be here. And congratulations on your success. What is it now, number two in the ratings?

Ram-Man: Thanks Adam. We're really proud of that. Now we just need to catch up to Stratos's Wild Kingdom. So, Man-at-Arms --

Man-at-Arms: Actually, I prefer Woman-at-Arms now.

Ram-Man: Oh, right, sorry. The surgery takes a little getting used to. Orko, you're a civil engineer, everyone knows that Prince Adam abdicated his throne to work with Eternian Pomeranian Rescue, but Teela, what are you doing now?

Teela: As most of you know I resigned from my post as Captain of the Palace Guard after I won my sexual harassment suit --

Ram-Man: Yeah, about that scandal, Teela. You did see what you were wearing to work everyday, didn't you? (audience hoots and hollers)

Teela: I told your producer that we're not going to get into that tonight. Anyway, I left the Guard and started the Morainia Club, which seeks to counter the effects of global warming from overuse of Rainbow Quartz. In fact, you can learn more about Morainia, the ice kingdom, from "A Trip to Morainia," an episode on Disc 3. Did you know that King Boreas reported last week that the Ice Glaciers of Whimsy have shrunk by .03 centimeters last year? And how --

Ram-Man: Right, right thanks, Teela. Let's bring out our next batch of guests. You all remember them as the Evil Warriors, made famous by their relentless assault on Castle Grayskull and their attempts to enslave all of Eternia's population: Skeletor, Evil Lyn, Beast Man, and TrapJaw!

(audience mildly applauds, a smattering of boos can be heard)

Skeletor: Silence fools! (more boos)

Ram-Man: Wow, Skeletor, you're about as popular now as you were when trying to topple the government and install your own totalitarian regime.

Skeletor: Yeah, those were the good old days…

Ram-Man: What are you up to now, Boneface?

Skeletor: Call me that again. Do it. I dare you, you little steel-capped mongoloid.

Adam: Now come on Skeletor, can't you just let bygones be bygones? It's been years since Castle Grayskull was bought and turned into a women's fitness center.

Skeletor: Look who's talking. You ever wear something that's not pink, your highness?

Beast Man: Ha! Ha! Ha! Arf!

Skeletor: Silence fool!

Orko: Geez, once a megalomaniacal dickhead, always a megalomaniacal dickhead.

Skeletor: Silence fool!

Teela: Where's He-Man when you need him?

Prince Adam: Uh, I've got to go to the bathroom.

Cringer: Me too!

(Prince Adam and Cringer suddenly get up and go behind stage; moments later, He-Man and Battlecat enter the studio; the audience erupts in applause)

Skeletor: He-Man!

He-Man: Hello Bone-butt. It's been a long time.

Ram-Man: Ladies and gentlemen this is a surprise! He-Man himself! Where'd you come from?

He-Man: Oh, I just decided to pop in.

Teela: Where's Adam?

He-Man: He's safe. Now, are you causing trouble again Bone-spleen?

Skeletor: Curses, He-Man! I thought I'd be rid of you once I sold Snake Mountain and moved to Jersey.

He-Man: Sorry Bone-Islets-of-Langerhans, but you should know I'll always show up if you get back to your old ways. How about we all just settle down, talk about these great, classic episodes on this awesome new DVD set and put the magical staffs and sinister-looking metal claws down. TrapJaw, I'm talking to you.

TrapJaw: Fine.

He-Man: Very good. Now, Ram-Man, I was going to mention how this set is notable because of the origin stories of Battlecat ("Battlecat"), Queen Marlena ("The Rainbow Warrior") and The Sorceress ("Origin of The Sorceress"). Those are my favorites.

Skeletor: Silence foo --

He-Man: Seriously, shut the hell up Bone-@#$%!

Ram-Man: Well, that's all the time we have tonight. I'd like to thank all my guests and especially He-Man and Battlecat for the surprise visit. I just wish Prince Adam and Cringer were here, but as long as they're safe, that's what's important. From me to you, Eternia: BOING! And good night!

Closing Statement

All Night Long with Ram-Man is brought to you by the BCI Eclipse release of the six-disc set He-Man and the Masters of the Universe: Season 2, Vol. 1, another excellent presentation and the standard-setter by which all animated television sets should be judged.

The Verdict

Not guilty. Ram-Man out!

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