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Case Number 25104: Small Claims Court

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Osombie (Blu-ray)

E1 Entertainment // 2012 // 94 Minutes // Not Rated
Reviewed by Judge David Johnson // January 11th, 2013

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All Rise...

Judge David Johnson knew it!

The Charge

The axis of evil undead.

The Case

Afghanistan. Most of the Army forces have cleared out, leaving only a few straggling detachments of special ops soldiers and NATO castoffs to clean-up. And it turns out there is plenty to clean up. The terrorists stumbled upon an exotic piece of chemical warfare that transforms its subjects into the walking dead. Facing imminent defeat, the mujahideen start shooting up prisoners with the virus and sending them out into the desert to do zombie stuff, which…as far as I can tell…involves wandering around and walking into bullets.

Those bullets are flung liberally by our heroes, led by a British sergeant and backed up by a spry blonde with a knack for sniper riflery and swordplay. As they navigate thsi treacherous and zombie-plagued desert, they stumble upon an even greater evil—none other than Osama bin Laden, re-animated and shambling around with the rest of his cronies.

Well, that certainly sounds ridiculous! And it is. What's odd is the fact that Osombie is surprisingly lacking in mirth, for a script built on such a moronic concept. I'd like to think this is an immediate disqualifier for a film about a zombified Osama bin Laden, yet somehow the enterprise doesn't completely fall apart.

Before I continue, no, this is not a good movie. It's less-than-humorous tone doesn't do it any favors. The violence is, sadly, largely CGI-powered, and the plot is so flimsy and stupid I've already forgotten it.

And yet I cannot bring myself to dump on it. Because in spite of all of its shortcomings and misfires, Osombie is a movie about a zombie Osama bin Laden. Thankfully, Osombie actually gets some screen time, both in a memorable opening and later in an overheated finale. He's a fun creature design, largely built with practical make-up, props, and…well, if Osama bin Laden were in fact a grotesque undead abomination, I believe he would look precisely like what the inventive visual effects guys have envisioned here.

What keeps Osombie afloat is the filler. When OBL isn't lumbering around, you're looking at a straight-forward zombie shooter. It just so happens, these undead wear turbans and are buying it in the desert. The protagonists aren't terribly engaging (save for the female sword-swinger, which makes no sense), though they can tote around automatic weapons well enough and the mayhem is cool. In the end, the map for Osombie goes something like: "Hey it's zombie Osama bin Laden!"—killing time, killing time, killing time—"Hey it's zombie Osama bin Laden again!"

If that's good enough for you, enjoy.

Entertainment One offers up a solid Blu-ray, starting with a clean 1.78:1/1080p high definition widescreen transfer. Most of the action takes place in broad daylight, allowing the picture quality to flex its muscle. The CGI suffers under the HD microscope, but overall this is good stuff. The DTS-HD 5.1 Master Audio track suitably pumps out the gunfire and zombie muttering, and there's English SDH subtitles for the hard of hearing. There are no extras.

The Verdict

Looks like this douchebag has finally been brought to justice.

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Scales of Justice

Judgment: 70

Perp Profile

Studio: E1 Entertainment
Video Formats:
• 1.78:1 Non-Anamorphic (1080p)
Audio Formats:
• DTS HD 5.1 Master Audio (English)
• English (SDH)
Running Time: 94 Minutes
Release Year: 2012
MPAA Rating: Not Rated
• Action
• Blu-ray
• Horror

Distinguishing Marks

• None


• IMDb

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