Judge David Johnson thinks Satan is one horny dude.
Our review of Katarina's Nightmare Theater: Satan's Blood, published November 11th, 2011, is also available.
Terror, sex, and Satanic rituals on a one-way ride to Hell…
What is it about Satan that brings the nudity out in people? Satan's Blood (a.k.a Escalofrio) is a 1977 Spanish horror film that throws two couples in the middle of some wacky demonic hijinks, and manages to get all their clothes off and into extraordinarily compromising positions while worshipping the Dark One. Pictionary just isn't enough for some folks, I guess.
Facts of the Case
Andy (Jose Guillen) and Anna (Angel Aranda) are a young couple in love. One day, they decide to go out for a jaunt, and run into another couple, who seem to know them from years past. Andy is unsure, but his and Anna's politeness (and slight curiosity) gets the better of them, and they take up the new couple's invitation to hang out at their awesome house in the country.
As they lounge, Andy and Anna begin to suspect that there might be something menacing at play here. But before they can leave, a thunderstorm rolls in and the two opt to spend the night, heebie-jeebies be damned.
Following a brief lovemaking session in the bathtub, the two tuck in for a good night's sleep. Only thing is, a mysterious intruder attacks Anna and runs off, sending her screaming. Regrouping with her beau, Anna follows Andy to the living room to explore and both are stunned by the sight before them: their supposed "old friends" are kneeling in the middle of the living room floor, a pentagram scrawled at their feet, butt-naked and oiled up, chanting a love song to Satan.
Rooted in place by the sight, Anna and Andy are placed under a sort of spell, and both couples engage in a greasy Satanic orgy, writhing about, pulling off Twister-like maneuvers, and generally descending into an abyss of fornication and debauchery.
But the next morning, Anna and Andy don't seem to recall their little tryst with their new friends, and that's when the weird @#$% starts to happen. Anna is suddenly menaced by walking, bleeding porcelain dolls, Andy is constantly attacked by the other woman (naked more often than not), and the head of strange man is found in an icebox surrounded by his own guts. Now the once-innocent couple must survive the castle and its horrors, while trying to return to their normal lives—if that's possible.
Wooh boy. I think the filmmakers chose the wrong bodily fluid for the title of this crazy-ass flick. Quite simply, Satan's Blood is one of the sleaziest discs I've reviewed for the site. Aside from maybe Entrails of the Virgin, no other film has left me feeling as…icky…as this sucker.
In truth, it's all about that gratuitous orgy scene that gives this film its juice. It will take many a jaded human to come away from watching four people lathering up in I Can't Believe It's Not Butter, wrapping their genitals and various protuberances around each-other, bumping uglies on a pentagram while a hole burns through a painting of Jesus Christ, and not want to jump into the shower afterwards and scrub down Crying Game-style.
Satan's Blood is trash over-easy, made semi-coherent by a story that almost makes sense, and an unsettling atmosphere. Thanks to the handy promotional materials for the film, I learned that this film was tagged with an "S" rating, which stood for—surprise—sex. And though this may be marketed as a horror film, don't believe the hype; Satan's Blood is all about getting its characters in stages of undress. There are a few horror elements here, but they're either tame (oooh, a scary skull!) or laughable (so that guy in the icebox was made entirely of beef liver?!?).
The story eventually ultimately devolves, unraveling toward the end as our protagonist couple slowly flies off the deep end. Though I was kind of with it in the beginning, pretty much everything post-orgy loses focus, until, by the time the credits rolled, there had been a few too many reanimated corpses, yak-headed high priests, demonic flatmates, and anthropomorphic dolls to keep this ship afloat.
But, really, what are you looking for in these Spanish Satan flicks? Incoherence and full-frontal female nudity is textbook for these. Son, if this kind of filth is your cup of tea, then just go with it.
Mondo Macabro, a great studio specializing in international insanity, has once again done a marvelous job with the digital remastering of this film. The picture quality is very strong, the colors are solid, and the grain and dirt is minimal. A Spanish and a badly dubbed English 2.0 stereo mix are available.
For extras: a text-based "About the Film" introduction, an alternate opening, and an interesting, if not slightly disturbing, twenty-minute documentary about modern-day Satanism, featuring an ordained minister in the Church of Satan.
Satanic Spanish sex from the '70s. If that doesn't interest you, stay away.
The accused is hosed down.
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Scales of Justice
Studio: Mondo Macabro
• Alternate Opening
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