All Rise...

Judge David Johnson recreated a real-life shark attack using a cheeseburger and his mouth.

Editor's Note

Our reviews of Shark Week: Ocean Of Fear (published August 28th, 2008), Shark Week: The Great Bites Collection (published July 24th, 2009), and Shark Week: The Great Bites Collection (Blu-Ray) (published July 24th, 2009) are also available.

The Charge

"Compliments of Sharkie."

The Case

I think we can officially classify Discovery's Shark Week a pop culture phenomenon. And why shouldn't it be? It's a great examination of the sound and the fury of nature's premiere killing machine. Producers decide to cowboy up with Shark Week: Restless Fury, adding to the already established excellence of crazy guys swimming with sharks in nothing but a wetsuit and disturbingly intimate camera angles.

This go-round you've got those same crazy wetsuit guys swimming around with the sharks and also feeding a video camera to a Great White! I suppose there's some scientific purpose of having a POV shot from a shark's jawline, but mainly it just looks super awesome with all that teeth and stuff.

Six episodes over two discs:

Disc One
• "Into the Shark Bite"
Our heroes risk their extremities by trying to induce the sharks to gobble up video cameras. Sounds like a sound trade-off from where I stand!

• "Ultimate Air Jaws"
What is it like watching a Great White Shark flying through the air with a seal in his mouth, shot at 1,000 frames per second? Pretty much, that, a huge slow-motion shark in mid-air, which is awesome.

• "Day of the Shark III"
Real stories from shark attack survivors. Yikes.

• "Shark Attack Survival Guide"
Learn how to survive a terrifying shark assault from former Special Forces soldier Terry Schappert who, frankly, is far more terrifying. If Terry Schappert could teach me how to survive an attack from Terry Schappert—now that would let me sleep better at night.

• "Sharkbite Beach"
Time for some more recreations of shark attacks, with the 2008 incidents on the California coast the source of the nightmarish dramatizations.

Disc Two
• "Shark Week's Best Bites"
Craig Ferguson takes to the seas for his own shark-to-man experience.

Good stuff, and another tasty treat for fans of sharks. Which, of course, should be everyone with a DVD player. The details: full frame, 5.1 Dolby Digital surround and two full-length bonus programs, "Are They Hunting Us?" and "Man vs. Fish: Tiger Shark."

The Verdict

Not Guilty. Nom nom nom nom.

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