Our review of Fright Pack: Man's Worst Friends, published October 21st, 2005, is also available.
They ooze. They slime. They kill.
After killer swarms of bees, rats, and just about every other pest known to man somebody thought of making a movie about killer slugs. Lots of people get eaten alive by slimy things moving 10 feet an hour. If that premise sounds stupid to you, it gets worse. Most of the supporting cast was Spanish since they shot it in Spain pretending to be America. The voice acting rates among the worst in memory, and what story there is has holes and lapses in logic so large as to cause a huge shrug of the shoulders when the question of why anyone should watch this film comes up. So bad it's not even laughably bad; but Anchor Bay has released it anyway with an anamorphic transfer, no less.
Facts of the Case
Not a lot to relate here. Slugs get mutated from a toxic waste dump and turn into man-eaters. Working their way through the sewers they hit town and rise up to kill people. Mike Brady is the town health inspector who first puts goo and goo together to figure it out, but nobody believes him, because the idea of killer slugs is exactly as ludicrous as it sounds in the film. With the help of the head of sanitation and a chemist they have to come up with something to destroy the slugs.
I'll give credit that the gore effects were pretty well done, with slugs coming out of eye sockets and eating people alive. Gory, a bit funny, and those shots looked pretty good. The slugs themselves looked like real slugs so those effects (or maybe they used real slugs shot in extreme close-up) looked pretty good too.
Anchor Bay can give an anamorphic transfer to this waste of celluloid but MGM can't give one to The Princess Bride. The picture quality is better than fair, with a decent level of detail. Colors are a bit washed out and there is some grain to distract, but it's not bad. The sound is Dolby Digital mono and you can at least understand the dialogue, though it sounds harsh and forced and the musical score too strident.
The Rebuttal Witnesses
I can go on at length in this section, but the short version is that this movie stinks. It reeks. I can count on one hand the number of films I have seen that I might be tempted to call worse than this one. Horrible voice acting, wooden dialogue, an absolutely stupid plot that ignores the fact that all these people have to do is walk away, not even run from these slow moving slime travelers. The stupidity of the story defies imagination. The solution to this slug problem? Use a compound that both blows up half the town and pollutes the rest of it with arsenic. They might as well have dropped a nuke. The hero, when he sees his wife terrified because the slugs are filling up his house, leaves his wife there alone while going off to try to fight them. The film isn't even worth the time it took to write the words I just typed, let alone the time it took to watch it.
I gave credit to Anchor Bay for providing an anamorphic transfer to the film. That was about all they did for it, without even a trailer for an extra feature. In this case I can't say I blame them except for actually taking time and money to release it in the first place. But just for the sake of continuity, I will complain about the lack of subtitles for the hard of hearing community.
Unless you pride yourself on watching the absolute worst, Z-grade horror flicks, stay far, far away from this one. Even if you're one of those few lovers of really bad films, there are plenty of discs around more worth your money. Rent it if you must, but I'd just stay away. Be glad it was me instead of you who had to watch it first.
The makers of this film are sentenced to finding something better to do than make a movie about killer slugs. Anchor Bay is sentenced to probation under the condition that they better spend their time on films that deserve to be seen on DVD more than this one.
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Scales of Justice
Studio: Anchor Bay
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