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Case Number 18460: Small Claims Court

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Storm Seekers

Image Entertainment // 2008 // 84 Minutes // Not Rated
Reviewed by Judge Brett Cullum // March 5th, 2010

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All Rise...

Judge Brett Cullum is trapped inside the deadly eye of Daryl Hannah's botox.

The Charge

Trapped inside the deadly eye of a hurricane.

The Case

This 2008 made for cable TV movie starring Daryl Hannah (Splash) should be shown to all young actresses to warn them about the dangers of botox and bad plastic surgery. Daryl is hitting fifty soon, and she's fighting the good fight against aging with a lot of makeup and some good old fashioned nip tuck. She's also trying to pick projects that will keep us from thinking about her next birthday. Kill Bill: Volume 1 works to do that, but this? Darryl Hannah does her best to convince us she is a tortured meteorologist whose tragic past leads to her to risk her life tracking hurricanes. Mommy and daddy died in a storm, but she lived! Oh, the guilt and pain. A huge killer storm is out there, and she hops into a plane that seems to fall apart at the slightest wind. She also tells people what the hurricane is going to do and nobody believes her even though her data is sound and she's flying in the middle of the storm. Thrown in the mix are therapy flashbacks and traumatic moments from the character's childhood. In the end we don't even get to see this massive storm hit land, so we never witness the disaster the film promises. Imagine Titanic where the boat doesn't sink. Crappy, no? The only other actor of note in this mess is Dylan Neal (Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief).

DVD Verdict was sent a screener for this film, so we are not fully aware of final product details. I was thankful there were no extras, because after an hour and a half I was ready to eject this disc from my player before it damaged it. Truly, it's a bad one. I fully expect this one to be released in that $2 bin in the middle of a Wal-Mart aisle.

Look, I love Daryl Hannah. I would sit through a lot of bad movies just to see her, but this one is a whole new level of terrible. The CGI special effects look like they were made on an Atari 2600, the script is really bad, the acting is even worse; nothing works to save this one. It's a really bad film, and the DVD I saw didn't even bother to support it with extras. Maybe they know what they have, and want to leave it at that.

The Verdict

Hurricane Hannah trapped in a shitstorm of a movie!

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Scales of Justice

Judgment: 58

Perp Profile

Studio: Image Entertainment
Video Formats:
• 1.78:1 Anamorphic
Audio Formats:
• Dolby Digital 2.0 Stereo (English)
Subtitles:
• None
Running Time: 84 Minutes
Release Year: 2008
MPAA Rating: Not Rated
Genres:
• Action
• Disaster
• Science Fiction
• Television

Distinguishing Marks

• Featurettes

Accomplices

• IMDb
• What Daryl Loves








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