All Rise...

Judge P.S. Colbert fully admits to having gotten Satisfaction on a number of occasions, but those records are sealed!

The Charge

Let's spend some Mime together.

Opening Statement

Full disclosure: The Rolling Stones were my very first rock group. You know the kind; they steal your heart away and never give it back, even after they've jig-sawed, shattered, torn and frayed, brown-sugared and painted it, black…

The Case

The half-dozen appearances the filthy five made on The Ed Sullivan Show certainly weren't the group's most revelatory television spots—only vocals were performed live, and even those were abetted by pre-recorded backing tracks—but they may have been the most important. Remember this same variety hour formally introduced The Beatles to America, effectively ushering in our second "British Invasion."

Just as they did for The Fab Four, the good folks at SOFA Entertainment have packaged the whole kit 'n caboodle of meetings between The Stones and Sullivan (easily the most ill-suited man to ever host a variety show), presenting each episode in its entirety, including commercials for Hai Karate after shave, Aerowax floor shine, "Medically Tested" Proslim reducing pills, Vivarin Stimulant Tablets, and the occasional health advisory: "If you're not taking color pictures with the new Polaroid Colorpak camera, there's something being left out of your life."

You wanna know what America looked like on a Sunday night in 1964, 1966, and 1969? This package has that and more, all brilliantly restored and as easy to navigate as a magic carpet ride.

Let the good times begin!

Disc One
25 October 1964 • The Rolling Stones play "Around And Around" and "Time Is On My Side."
• Also appearing: Itzhak Perlman, Laurence Harvey, the Kim Sisters, the Berosinis, Peg Leg Bates, comedy duo Stiller and Meara, and comedians London Lee and Phyllis Diller.

2 May 1965
• The Rolling Stones play "The Last Time," "Little Red Rooster," "Everybody Needs Somebody To Love," and "2120 South Michigan Avenue."
• Also appearing: Tom Jones, Dusty Springfield, Topo Gigio, Leslie Uggams, Gitta Morelly, jugglers The Half Brothers, comedy duo Morecambe and Wise, and comedienne Totie Fields.

Note: The first two episodes are presented in black and white as The Ed Sullivan Show was broadcast until September 1965. The remaining episodes are in color.

13 February 1966
• The Rolling Stones play "(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction," "As Tears Go By," and "19th Nervous Breakdown."
• Also appearing: Señor Wences, Les Olympiades, the Romanian Folk Ballet, actor Hal Holbrook as Abraham Lincoln, and comedians Eddie Schaeffer and Sandy Baron.

Disc Two
11 September 1966
• The Rolling Stones play "Paint It, Black," "Lady Jane," and "Have You Seen Your Mother, Baby, Standing In The Shadow?"
• Also appearing: Louis Armstrong, Robert Goulet, the Muppets, Metropolitan Opera singers Franco Corelli and Renata Tebaldi, Joan Rivers, and Red Skelton.

15 January 1967
• The Rolling Stones play "Ruby Tuesday," and "Let's Spend Some Time Together."
• Also appearing: Petula Clark, acrobat Monroe, the Michael Bennett Dancers, the Muppets, comedians Flip Wilson and Alan King, and Sisters '67, a group of 44 Benedictine nuns singing "Kumbaya."

23 November 1969
• The Rolling Stones play "Gimme Shelter," "Love In Vain," and "Honky Tonk Women."
• Also appearing: Ella Fitzgerald, Topo Gigio, Hawthorne Tiger & Horses, and comedians Rodney Dangerfield, Lucho Navarro, and Robert Klein.

Note: Unfortunately, I was sent screener copies for review, so I can only hope the promised extras (a 24-page photo-loaded booklet and replica of a 1966 Ed Sullivan Show admission ticket) are not only included, but enhance this already pleasurable experience.

The Rebuttal Witnesses

Hey, Man…I dig The Stones and all, but why all the other junk? I mean, Robert Goulet? Topo Gigio? Totie Fields?!

Closing Statement

Unappreciative, willfully oblivious punks who may purchase this set have two options: 1) They can employ the "Play Rolling Stones Songs" only option on each disc, or 2) they can save themselves some money by restricting their viewing habits to YouTube.

Either way, such unappreciative, willfully oblivious punks are hereby advised to Get Off My Cloud!

The Verdict

One can never rightfully call The Rolling Stones innocent.

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