The Charge

Awesome shows for teens! (Written by middle-aged bald men?)

Opening Statement

Five shows, 122 minutes of programming—but where's the damn green slime?

Facts of the Case

Another day, another collection of Nickelodeon original programming. This go-around brings us a sample of five different shows from the "TEENick" branch of the network. As can be deduced from the clever title, these shows are tuned toward the teenaged demographic.

Zoey 101
• "Prank Week"
This show revolves around of girls who are the first crop of females to attend Pacific Coast Academy, formerly an all-boys boarding school that has just recently opened its doors to the gentler sex, and stars Jamie Lynn Spears as the titular character, who looks like a clone of her big sister Britney. This episode has Zoey and her pals embroiled in a prank war with the boys. But when the escapades get out of hand, Zoey finds herself facing expulsion.

Drake and Josh
• "We're Married"
So, I guess these two guys Drake and Josh (played by Drake Bell and Josh Peck, respectively) are step-brothers and they get into all kinds of wacky hijinks. This show has Drake meeting his international; e-pal for the first time, and it turns out she's an Eastern European hottie. Well, one goofy misunderstanding leads to another, and in an attempt to recreate a friendship ceremony from her culture, the boys accidentally put together a marriage ceremony! Wah wah waaaaaaaa.

Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide
• "Computer Labs/Backpacks"
Ned Bigby (Devon Werkheiser) is just trying to get through junior high in one piece. To do this, he's developed his own school survival guide, which he dips into to spotlight two elements each episode. This installment brings us the dos and don'ts of computer lab usage and what makes a good backpack.

Romeo!
• "Good Press"
Romeo! tells the story of Romeo (rapper Lil' Romeo) and his pals as they try to embark on an embryonic music career. Romeo must balance his aspirations to fame in the music business with life as a confused teenaged boy. In this episode, he and his long-time friend Peyton decide to officially become "boyfriend and girlfriend," and during a radio interview, Romeo, at the behest of his manager, denies having a girlfriend. Now he must deal with the relationship fallout of his deception.

Unfabulous
• "The Little Sister"
Emma Roberts stars as Addie Singer, a middle school girl trying to make her way through life. She has a big brother named Ben, who was legend in school, and she is constantly trying to individualize herself, and creep out from his imposing shadow. Here, she is determined to do something that Ben has never done—write her own "kick-butt" newspaper column. But an embarrassing typo leads to widespread humiliation.

The Evidence

I've got fond memories of some of Nickelodeon's earliest endeavors at live-action, teen-oriented programming: The Adventures of Pete and Pete, Salute Your Shorts, and Are You Afraid of the Dark? were pretty dope. I thought Clarissa Explains it All was pure crap, but no network can bat a thousand. The episodes on this disc represent the first time I've been exposed to any of these series, and are, as tradition dictates, a mixed bag. Here's my ranking, from favorite to least-favorite:

• "Computer Lab/Backpacks"
Original and amusing, this episode of Ned's Declassified sports likable characters and a non-linear, assemblage of sketches that I reckon would resonate with junior high dwellers everywhere. Plus, Jim J. Bullock is in it!

• "The Little Sister"
Emma Roberts is a charmer, and the gags worked well enough. The lack of a half-assed laugh track was appreciated.

• "Prank Week"
I could see how kids might be attracted to the hip dudes and dudettes of Pacific Coast Academy. Still, there's a big cheese factor going on here, though the final shot of a statue peeing is pretty funny.

• "We're Married"
Err, I'm not feeling the Drake and Josh vibe. Canned laughs, lame sitcom tactics, and a pair of protagonists that irritated me characterize this mediocre episode. Plus, the accidental wedding has been done to death and the resolution of the problem is the definition of "cop-out."

• "Good Press"
Sorry Romeo, but this is one star-crossed, boring show.

As for the disc itself, nothing surprising: just previews for extras, full frame, 2.0 stereo—you know the drill.

Closing Statement

An uneven selection of episodes, but fans of TEENick likely won't mind

The Verdict

Not guilty. I'm in a good mood.

Similar Decisions

• Comedy Central Roast Of Pamela Anderson
• Kids In The Hall: Brain Candy
• Shelley Duvall's Tall Tales And Legends: Pecos Bill
• Cold Feet

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